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From Rabbi Brian28/40

Employment Opportunity: Self-Hate Required.

Imagine the following advertisement:

  • Are you overly critical of yourself?
  • Do you invest in misery?
  • The Bank of Self-Hate is looking to hire!

Hopefully, you are not overly qualified.

The idea comes from the book There Is Nothing Wrong With You: Going Beyond Self-Hate by self-proclaimed teacher and student of Soto Zen, author Cheri Huber.

She explains that many people do “good deed” after “good deed” depositing “credits” into a proverbial bank account. When they decide to treat themselves well and attempt to make a metaphoric withdrawal, the banker at their “the Bank of Self-Hate” informs them that they haven’t done enough.

Do you feel this way?  Can you hear your banker telling you that despite all your deposits, you still do not have enough deposits to warrant you being kind to yourself?

Many of us feel this way.

Martha Beck has this wonderful quote:

The repercussions of one person living in stubborn gladness are incalculable.

Be that person. And, if you can’t be that person, at least start living in that direction. Fritz Perls said, “Awareness is in itself curative.”  As so long as you know the destination, you are on your way.

Spiritual-religious advice: be kind to yourself simply because you are you.


With love,

Rabbi Brian

Rabbi Brian

Rabbi Brian
Rabbi Brian Zachary Mayer is the founder of Religion-Outside-The-Box.

His day job is teaching advanced mathematics to Los Angeleno High School students. The rest of the time is with his family.

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