— Emmett is three. Annie is one. We are at the LA Zoo, making our way from the entrance to the animals. Years ago, the entrance was moved, for better parking. That made visitors, like us, pass through the main gates, climb a large hill, and walk about a quarter of a mile before […]
Ants I didn’t Want Read More »
Who’s Your Daddy? AUTHOR’S NOTE: The following essay details my thoughts about God’s genitalia. Some might find this shocking. And it very may be. However, I find the lack of disdain for the imagery of God to be perennially presented as male to be a crime much worse than my imagining the logical conclusion
“It’s our little secret,” I hear grandma say into the black metal telephone handset I’m holding with two hands. I’m about 5 years old. I smile. She and I end our phone calls like this. Always. I tell her, “Grandma, I have a secret.” And she says, “I have a secret too. I love
The rabbi who had been working with Charley’s family was forced to leave when Charley — suffering from untreatable cancer — chose to schedule “death with dignity” for the following Tuesday. That rabbi’s rabbinical union dictated that they not officiate. “I got you,” I tell Norman when he, Charley, and I are on a
My assessment of the Apple Watch—get it for this singular feature: its ability to ping your phone—sold both my neighbor Betsy and my mom on getting theirs. Betsy and I are doing facetime. We are co-sleuthing with Google: How to get notifications on an iPhone and iWatch simultaneously. I read, step by step, as Betsy
After hearing the cycle of the alarm clock and snooze button from 7:00 until now, 7:32, I open her shades and curtain. “Time to get up,” I coo, trying to soften the transition from delicious sleep to preparing for school. She orients herself to the room and declares, “I need eight more minutes of
George Carlin had a routine about how anyone who drives faster than you is a maniac and anyone who drives slower is an idiot. “It’s surprising,” the comic mused, “we get anywhere at all with all these maniacs and idiots on the road.” I’m thinking about with whom we compare ourselves. Our delight with our abilities
There are difficult things to think about when it comes to starting a new religion. Getting started with filling out the paperwork shouldn’t be one of the difficulties. Hi. I’m Rabbi Brian. I’ve been assigned to provide you with assistance. Today we will be looking at “Starting a New Religion, Section 1Eª 1-5: God
Years ago, I wisely gifted visiting friends the large, stainless steel mandoline I had received years earlier as a wedding present. (I wrote “I received” instead of “we received ” because my beloved isn’t a cook.) “You want me to just take it? It’s beautiful. Almost new.” Zanthe exclaimed. “That sharp blade, my brain,”
It’s raining. People think it’s always raining in Portland, but that’s not true. We have lots of moisture in the air more than 150 days a year. But it’s not always rain, like the kind for which you might use an umbrella. Right now, however, it’s coming down in My mom arrived yesterday afternoon
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