“Yes, and three shoes.”
A life lesson from Improv.
Last August, I was recruited to play some Improv games – the type that have been made popular by the show Who’s Line is it Anyway.
Not knowing much about the topic, I asked everyone I knew who might have some expertise in the subject what he or she thought the most important things would be for me to keep in mind.
Repeatedly, the advice I was given was to always say ‘yes, and . . . .’
Everyone agreed that I should avoid saying “no” because it would inevitably shut the scene down, thus ending the fun.
I was told, for example, if someone in a scene said to me, “You certainly love guacamole!” my response should be, “Yes, and . . .” and then I should add some new information.
Here are two examples:
- “Isn’t this the best zoo you’ve ever visited?”
- “Yes, and the orangutans here sure are the tastiest!”
- “Do you want some ice cream?”
- “Yes, and three shoes . . .”
I quickly realized that this tip wasn’t only useful for improvisations – it was a life lesson too.
The word “no” really puts a stop to things.
Look at the difference between these two responses:
- “Do you like the soup?”
- “No, it needs salt.”
- “Do you like the soup?”
- “Yes, and I could use some salt.”
When someone tells me that they want something or asks me a question, I have the option to affirm them or to shut them down. I know when I’ve been in their shoes that the former is much more pleasant.
How about making a commitment to test this out for a little while?
(You already know the answer, it’s “Yes, and . . . “)
With love,
Rabbi Brian
And, if you care to, click here to see comments on the streetprophets site where this article went up last week.