See Me.

77% Weekly Newsletter

See Me.


Shoes.
Shoes.
Shoes. 

The long glass wall separates me from a display of more than 100,000 shoes at Auschwitz-Birkenau. 

Men’s shoes and women’s shoes and children’s shoes and baby shoes. 

Everyday shoes and work shoes and formal shoes and boots and sandals and slippers and high-heeled shoes and orthopedic shoes. 

Woven sandals and wooden-soled shoes and leather shoes and cloth shoes. 

Shoes collected and preserved after the camp’s liberation in 1945 by Soviet forces. 

Each shoe a harrowing testament to a foot that once walked in it. 

A person who lived. A person who was murdered and, most assuredly, forgotten.

✧✧✧

I’m 20 years old and just back from a trip to Poland.

I buy primary color paints and turn my formerly-white sneakers into works inspired by Jackson Pollack, so that each shoe screams PLEASE SEE ME.

P – 🔴
L – 🔵
E – 🟢
A – 🟣
S – 🟠
E – 🩷

S – ❤️
E – 🩵
E – 💚

M – 💜
E – 💛

PLEASE SEE ME!

✧✧✧

I like to be seen.
I want to be seen.
I (feel a) need to be seen.

✧✧✧

I teach a four-point definition of love—S.A.U.R. 

Love =
S = seeing
A = accepting
U = understanding/empathy/sympathy
R = response

There is no love without feeling seen. 

Feeling seen for who we really are is life giving. 

Primal.

✧✧✧

We answer the question “How are you?” with pablum. 

There is no being seen in the words “Fine,” “Not too bad,” and “Alright.” 

I wonder what our lives might look like if we took the extra time to actually—and honestly—answer the question “How are you?”

We’d get a chance to see one another.

✧✧✧

Me, right now? 

How am I? 

Right now, as I type, part of me is proud, part of me is sad, part of me is hurried, part of me is curious if you’ll respond. 

 

I still have the shoes.

Refractory Anxiety

I am supposed to arrive at the wedding rehearsal at 4 p.m. I planned on arriving 15–20 minutes early. Because I don’t like being late. However, I took a wrong turn. At the intersection of the I-5 South and the I-405 South, I went the wrong way. Now, I’ll have to turn around in a mile and a half and

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No words. No words.

To offset our discomfort about our upcoming visit to the Terezín (in German: Theresienstadt) concentration camp/ghetto, Emmett and I fall into making dark jokes. Gallows humor. “Do you think they still give free tattoos upon arrival?” “Want to wear matching pajamas for our tour?” Dark, ugly jokes.  Because reality is just too overwhelming. The feelings are too overwhelming. So we

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Has anyone seen my keys?!

Jane and the kids misplace keys. Not me. I don’t. I always return my key to the keyrack. That’s where they go. When the key isn’t on the hook, which happens from time to time, I find it on some surface in the house. Usually, the kitchen table. Then, without fanfare, I pick it up, hang it up, and restrain

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77% Weekly Newsletter
77% Weekly Newsletter